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Story tag results for humour

Found 67 result(s)

Dream Job (Everyman's Fantasy)

- The California Board of Education meeting once again ran late into the night. The stale air became stifling in the August evening, as the air conditioning units had been shut down over an hour ago. Te...

By: DirtyMartini | Category: Humor | Score: 4.8| Added: 20 Oct 2009

Pete And Joe Get Laid (Second Stab At Humor In Sex

- Pete and Joe have been friends all their lives. As such, they have shared quite a bit in the 30 or so odd years they have known each other. They shared a neighborhood. They shared a school. They share...

By: DirtyMartini | Category: Humor | Score: 4.8| Added: 21 Oct 2009

Happy I Went To Work

- Hornier and hornier all the time, I'm lucky horniness isn't a crime. Checkin' out the new girl at work, She probably thinks I'm such a jerk. Trying to think of something to say, Anything to get a lay....

By: DirtyMartini | Category: Erotic Poems | Score: 4.5| Added: 26 Oct 2009

Flight Lessons

- After my divorce following nearly twenty years of marriage, I settled into a condo in Central New Jersey. The combination of not having a wife and the freedom of condo living gave me newfound opportun...

By: DirtyMartini | Category: Exhibitionism | Score: 5| Added: 29 Oct 2009

Mistaken Identity

- Back in the day, the early 1980's to be precise, I was badly in need. In need of a job, to be more specific. These were times of prosperity for most. The Dow had recently hit 2000, which was a record....

By: DirtyMartini | Category: Interracial | Score: 4.9| Added: 30 Oct 2009

Johnny And Mary

- Johnny and Mary Now Johnny knew Mary since they were little tykes, Running in the field, riding their bikes, Like other little kids, they stayed out all day, Doing their chores, later they'll play, J...

By: DirtyMartini | Category: Love Poems | Score: 5| Added: 03 Nov 2009

Locked Inside

- As the eighties wore on my friend Rich's telephone business began to prosper. I stayed along for the ride and eventually became his partner. I had gone back to school nights at Rutgers to complete my ...

By: DirtyMartini | Category: Group Sex | Score: 4.9| Added: 07 Nov 2009

Eve

- Hello people. Hope you are doing well out there in Fantasy Land. What, you say you are not in Fantasy Land? Oh you will be soon. Don't worry, because we are going deep into Fantasy Land. So deep, we m...

By: DirtyMartini | Category: Straight Sex | Score: 4.9| Added: 14 Nov 2009

The Queen

- I am so ashamed. I am just so ashamed of myself, you have no idea. I have been so bad I should be punished by one or two of you fine looking women. Really, I have been a bad boy. I have let you people...

By: DirtyMartini | Category: Straight Sex | Score: 4.9| Added: 15 Nov 2009

SilkPanties22 (Fourth Stab)

- One of my newfound hobbies, so to speak, is reading and writing sex fantasy stories on a sex fantasy website. It is a site I stumbled across while innocently reading an article on sex fantasy. Since...

By: DirtyMartini | Category: Humor | Score: 5| Added: 21 Nov 2009

A Dream to Build a Life On

- Chapter 1 - Falling They move across the dance floor, perfectly fitted to each other.  Cheek to cheek they dance.  To the music they sway.  He in black tux, bow tie and all, she in a crimson...

By: Woman | Category: Novels | Score: 4.9| Added: 01 Dec 2009

Clumsy. PRELUDE TO A KISS + PART 1

- -This serial story is about my experiences with my first boyfriend. It's not a fantasy, and some of the events may be classed as more humourous/romantic rather than sexual. This first installment is n...

By: DanishPastry | Category: First Time | Score: 4.6| Added: 11 Feb 2010

Healthcare Reform (A nurse fantasy)

- As I drove over to the new healthcare clinic, I was a bit apprehensive. I truly hate going to doctors. I usually only go to a doctor after I've either broken something or I am bleeding so profusely th...

By: DirtyMartini | Category: Humor | Score: 5| Added: 14 Mar 2010

I Married A Hooker

- I met a girl who walked the street, I have to say she really looked sweet, Tight skirt of leather and lace, Long hair framed a pretty face, Didn't take much more than a glance, To realize I wanted to ...

By: DirtyMartini | Category: Erotic Poems | Score: 4.8| Added: 23 Apr 2010

Inappropriate Behaviour

- I'm a psychiatrist. My name is Dr. Baker. I was hired by Roy Channing of Channing Chemicals to treat his 21-year old daughter Darla for her inappropriate sexual behaviour. Darla had recently been ex...

By: aussiescribbler | Category: Reluctance | Score: 4.8| Added: 05 Aug 2010

Anna

- It's amazing how you trundle along through life, and then something comes along and throws everything out the proverbial window. That happened to me the other day. It was unplanned and uncalled for...

By: Irene | Category: Lesbian | Score: 4.7| Added: 18 Dec 2010

My Girlfriend Told Me She's Gay

- I had a girlfriend who told me she's gay, My first reaction was to say "No way." I gave this situation some heavy thought, It seemed so against everything I was taught, I told her she just had to go, ...

By: DirtyMartini | Category: Love Poems | Score: 4.8| Added: 01 Jan 2011

The Affair, part the second

- Our hapless couple had met in a hotel and things were just getting exciting when the fire alarm started sounding……. The ringing of the fire alarm was joined by another ringing sound... the bedsi...

By: SirLoin | Category: Humor | Score: 4.8| Added: 13 Jan 2011

Tilt - A Weird Science Story

- "If this ain't Nowheresville you can sure see it from here," growled Billy "The Kid" Kincaid as he pulled up to the only truckstop in Monkey Spank, New Mexico, his fire-engine red hotrod spewing steam...

By: aussiescribbler | Category: First Time | Score: 4.3| Added: 25 Apr 2011

Vegetation Management

- We'd not seen a summer like this one in a long time, 2 solid months of record breaking temperatures and no relief in sight. My man off on business, I had just finished some tuneup work on my bike, an...

By: GreatHunting | Category: Reluctance | Score: 5| Added: 18 Aug 2011

Bedroom Antics

- Chapter the First In which businesses prosper, families meet and a marriage is arranged, but no improprieties occur. It was a large house, set in a small park, but it could never look like a ho...

By: charmbrights | Category: Straight Sex | Added: 14 Sep 2011

Totally Unacceptable

- Dedication: This story is just a bit of fun and is respectfully dedicated to all the tireless story checkers on Lush, whose hard work makes this site possible and who have to put with rubbish like th...

By: overmykneenow | Category: Taboo | Score: 4.8| Added: 26 Sep 2011 Editor's Pick

Carol's Craving

- (c) 2001 Charmbrights. All rights reserved. The author has asserted the moral rights under sections 77 and 78 of the Copyright Designs and Patents Act 1988. Carol and Jeremy Coming away from ...

By: charmbrights | Category: Interracial | Added: 29 Sep 2011

Dialogue

- Hello my dear It's been a while Why don’t you make yourself comfortable, sit back, relax. Are you comfortable honey?... Mmm, good, that’s good. Why don’t you take those off for me?  Tha...

By: LittleSister_ | Category: Love Poems | Score: 5| Added: 06 Mar 2012

Sienna's Seduction - Part IV

- Minidevilette© 2012 His blood thundered through his veins as he let the sound of her voice wash over him, the sweetest three syllables he thought he ever heard in his life. Certainly the most antici...

By: Minidevilette | Category: Love Stories | Score: 4.8| Added: 01 Apr 2012

Versus Verses - Vaginal Crossfire and Other Poems

- The following poems were all written for, and published in, the Versus Verses thread on the Poets Corner of the forums. They are hopefully light and mildy humourous affairs. I hope you enjoy. Cum Gir...

By: CumGirl | Category: Love Poems | Added: 03 Jun 2012

Beach Bums

- Two ladies have very different opinions on what can be considered acceptable beach-wear and one attempts to forcibly impose her views, abusing her position as beach life-guard. This is a genuine (if ...

By: Julie_Julia | Category: BDSM | Score: 4.7| Added: 08 Jul 2012

Dealing with Death Part I

- Sarah sat up in her bed. She flinched as she put her feet on the floor, waiting for the cold floorboards to make her curl her toes in pain. “Well that’s weird.” She didn’t feel anything apart from ...

By: elitfromnorth | Category: First Time | Score: 4.9| Added: 14 Jul 2012 Audio version available

Dealing with Death Part II

- The Grim Reaper stuck his bony hand inside his cloak, and pulled out a pocketwatch with a chain attached to whatever was inside. “For fuck's sake. Can you get your saggy ass moving? We’re already l...

By: elitfromnorth | Category: Lesbian | Score: 4.9| Added: 27 Jul 2012 Audio version available

Dealing with Death Part III

- Bill held out his scythe and spun it around along the wall, carving a hole there. A blinding flash struck out as he finished the oval circle. The wall seemed to open up as a portal to the other side w...

By: elitfromnorth | Category: Anal | Score: 5| Added: 01 Aug 2012

Copycouple

- The autumn rain hammered down onto the darkened skylights above him as he wandered down the hallway. As he went through his evening routine of checking that all the lights were off, he locked each off...

By: elitfromnorth | Category: Fetish | Score: 4.9| Added: 01 Sep 2012 Audio version available

Donna

- I first posted a series of tales about Donna on a blog called the Girls’ Coffee Shop. I have made them a little more suited to a site of this type. I hope you will see the jokes although I know mos...

By: monica3 | Category: Lesbian | Score: 4.9| Added: 27 Sep 2012

Donna and Genetics and Donna and a Dress

- You might find it easier to follow this series if you start at the first and read them in order. I hope you enjoy Donna, pointed to an article in another edition of the same red-top she had shown me...

By: monica3 | Category: Lesbian | Score: 5| Added: 29 Sep 2012

Donna and the Work of Art and Donna's Appetite

- Donna and the Work of Art Donna’s new job led to a number of good things. The gallery in which she worked was nearer to my home than her own and so she was inclined more often to stay over with me....

By: monica3 | Category: Lesbian | Score: 5| Added: 09 Oct 2012

The Lady of Shallot

- The Lady of Shallot Like an onion, you'd have me peel Knowing full well how I'd feel. Swooning, my head it would reel As naughty glances you would steal. Layer after layer must fall off...

By: BIC | Category: Love Poems | Score: 5| Added: 16 Oct 2012

Donna and the Fish and Donna's Insecurity

- Donna and the Fish ‘It’s all a matter of juxtaposition.’ Donna looked exquisite. It was another exhibition at her gallery and she was wearing a beautiful pair of black, high cut trousers support...

By: monica3 | Category: Lesbian | Score: 4.9| Added: 16 Oct 2012

X is for Xenia

- A buxom maiden of nineteen years was Xenia Xerxes Whose step-dad told her, his guests she must please. Xenia most happily obeyed As her body she displayed Naked for all newcomers to see...

By: BIC | Category: Love Poems | Score: 4| Added: 20 Oct 2012

E is for Eating Out

- The most amorous epicurean pleasure, Up to which none others can measure, Is that rarest meat treat by far. I mean, of course, pussy tartar. It’s a sexual gastronomic treasure. This g...

By: BIC | Category: Love Poems | Score: 4| Added: 30 Oct 2012

The very model of an immodest maid in general

- I am not a good example of young ladies of this century. My peers say I am much too fey and not what I am meant to be. I eschew Fox News and biased views because I am all too smart To fa...

By: BIC | Category: Love Poems | Score: 5| Added: 14 Nov 2012

Opera with a nice ring to it

- Blessed bare on the enchanted summit. What lies there? Puss-puss or somewhat. How delightful is this glimmering sight! Breasts heaving in that armour tight. Siegfried is taken by amorous fits. The ar...

By: BIC | Category: Love Poems | Score: 5| Added: 15 Nov 2012

A polite man's wife is not a happy one

- When dealing with sexual frustration (frustration) Because wifely duties are not done. (are notdone) When the better half blames menstruation, (menstruation) A polite man knows what ...

By: BIC | Category: Love Poems | Score: 5| Added: 17 Nov 2012

When I was all laid

- I was just sixteen when I began to learn How acting bad would make my bum burn. My mother and father never spared the rod. They thought beating me was ordained by God. But such punishmen...

By: BIC | Category: Love Poems | Score: 5| Added: 19 Nov 2012

Three little sluts who drool‏

- Each girl described below is over the age of 16 TRIO – Cum-Cum , Peep-Hole , and Titties-Sing , with Chorus of Girls . The Three . Three little sluts who drool are we, Hungry for any cock we se...

By: BIC | Category: Love Poems | Score: 4| Added: 21 Nov 2012

For she is a pure cum slut

- Despite all of the evidence Like cream inside her underpants She remains technically pure She remains technically pure Of the sex act she is wary Though she’d long since lost her cherry ...

By: BIC | Category: Love Poems | Score: 5| Added: 22 Nov 2012

The Mistress of subs, see?

- I am Mistress of men like thee Who’ll do anything for me No matter how embarrassing, depraved or bad. Just like my cousins, my brothers and my dad. My ass licking cousins whom I've fuck...

By: BIC | Category: Love Poems | Score: 5| Added: 24 Nov 2012

My Sniveling Toads, Good Morning

- BITCH I am a Mistress as I said before TOADIES And you treat us as you should BITCH You’re sniveling little chaps Whose bums need many slaps With a paddle made of...

By: BIC | Category: Love Poems | Score: 4| Added: 25 Nov 2012

Queen Gamer’s Song ( I can't think why!)

- If you pay close attention, and I’m very sure you do, You’ll discover I am no one you can easily pooh-pooh. My body’s very finely tuned as is my intellect. If I’ve any faults at all, they’re...

By: BIC | Category: Love Poems | Score: 4.5| Added: 26 Nov 2012

Trial by Jury of Her Peers (or oglers)

- When I,dear friend, first became a slut I started withso much passion But unlike the whores who lewdly strut My clothing was well out of fashion. I’d bras and thongs and minis very shor...

By: BIC | Category: Love Poems | Score: 5| Added: 27 Nov 2012

Yin/Yang Yoga

- Yin/Yang Yoga Classes were designed for the spiritual enrichment of boys and girls between the ages of 17 and 20. Therefore members were recruited from local High Schools and colleges. Parental per...

By: BIC | Category: Group Sex | Score: 3.5| Added: 13 Dec 2012

Bare-Butt Buttocks Burning Bright

- Was her buttocks lewdly shown O'er a knee, her thong pulled down? They saw a gorgeous brace of buns. How smooth her shaven Venus Mons!   Her nether garment was slipped off Past her jeans which she ...

By: BIC | Category: Love Poems | Score: 4| Added: 26 Jan 2013

Choking the Blue Snake

- Sir Edmund Bluesnake walked into the library of his manor and slumped down in one of the lounge chairs. It had been a hard day’s work. Not only did he have to make sure that the beer his brewery was m...

By: elitfromnorth | Category: Quickie Sex | Score: 4.7| Added: 26 Mar 2013

In Search Of A Young Spud, I Mean Stud

- There once was a young gal, Who was so very shy, She joined a hot site, Hoping to meet a guy. It took her some time, To really get in the mix, She had to endure getting sent, Endless pi...

By: DirtyMartini | Category: Love Poems | Score: 4.9| Added: 26 Mar 2013

Mariah... My Wank Mistress

- We first made contact about three years ago, on one of those dirty dating sites. I was showing my tranny profile, Velvet, at the time, and was being hit on by a bunch of dirty old men, when this "Mar...

By: VelvetC | Category: Crossdressing | Score: 5| Added: 27 Mar 2013

Roger

- “Well, it’s over.” Roger Jones tossed his keys on the table near the door. “She doesn’t want to have anything to do with me anymore.” Roger slouched his way into the living room, hands in the pocke...

By: Tashtego | Category: Straight Sex | Score: 4.8| Added: 07 Apr 2013 Editor's Pick

They Came For Your Anus - Act I

- In the town of Badonkadonk there lived a man called Chuck Johnson. Chuck was just an average guy. He was twenty one years old and still lived with his parents. He had an older brother, Lance, who’d re...

By: OJGoodman | Category: Supernatural | Score: 5| Added: 24 Apr 2013

Squirting

- Oh woe is me, I wonder why My little pussy is so dry? Could it be while on the cam I squirted like the Hoover Dam? And that excited my old boy Who encouraged me to use a toy. Then on the cof...

By: Plushbunny | Category: Love Poems | Score: 4.8| Added: 14 May 2013

Donna and Equality, Donna's Friend and Donna's Philosophy

- Donna and Equality ‘If,’ said Donna, ‘all men are created equal, what about women?’ She had the ability to raise such matters at moments when I was not entirely able to reply, this time being enga...

By: monica3 | Category: Lesbian | Score: 4.9| Added: 12 Jun 2013

Donna and some more exploits

- Donna and Nellie’s Tits (again) One evening, while waiting for Donna in the pub I was chatting to Nellie at the bar. It was quiet and no other customers were there. Nellie was moaning about her ch...

By: monica3 | Category: Lesbian | Score: 4.9| Added: 21 Jun 2013

Donna and: Nellie's Indiscretion, the Hat and Donna turns heterosexual

- Donna and Nellie’s Indiscretion I arrived late one evening at the pub which we always refer to as the Jill and Whistle. I was rather taken aback when I saw Nellie standing beside Donna. This would...

By: monica3 | Category: Lesbian | Score: 4.8| Added: 02 Jul 2013

Messy Saturday Morning

- I lifted the wheelbarrow by its handles and tipped the last of the grass clippings into the compost pile. I’d been busy in the garden all morning and had worked up quite a sweat, well, Autumn was f...

By: Mazza | Category: Quickie Sex | Score: 5| Added: 15 Jul 2013

What's in a Dry Old Fuck? - Chapters One to Three

- Chapter One Len’s Bar on a Friday evening after a hard week was the place to go in those days. Everybody and his secretary and his brother and his mistress (or his would-be mistress) were there. ...

By: TallMan34 | Category: Straight Sex | Score: 5| Added: 21 Aug 2013

What's in a Dry Old Fuck? - Chapters Four and Five

- Chapter Four As the days went by, George’s words still haunted me. But I was back at my desk within three days and pissing better than ever. From that point of view, the surgeon had been right. A...

By: TallMan34 | Category: Straight Sex | Score: 4.5| Added: 22 Aug 2013

What's in a dry old fuck - Conclusion

- Chapter Six The following week, Mary called again to see where I was on her proposed project, and my secretary arranged a second discussion meeting. I had been thinking about this little Canadia...

By: TallMan34 | Category: Straight Sex | Score: 4| Added: 23 Aug 2013

The Untimely Death Of Viagra Victor (Aged 92)

- Put down the kettle, Ethel, the blue pill is kicking in, Throw on your sexy bloomers and pour us both a gin. I feel a stirring in my slacks as wrinkled flesh engorges, The diamond doll is working, and...

By: stephanie | Category: Love Poems | Score: 4.8| Added: 02 Dec 2013 Audio version available

For Your Dining Pleasure, Part 2

- It wasn't that Mona disliked being referred to as the 'Cream Queen', or the 'Queen of Cream', or whatever. It was just that it annoyed her that she herself couldn't help but play up to the naked innue...

By: L8LastNight | Category: Straight Sex | Score: 5| Added: 17 Jan 2014

Satanic Seduction

- “Ok, who’s next?” Lucifer shifted on his throne, shifting his long red tail to one side, and looked at the list of names on the fireproof piece of paper on the desk in front of him. “Colin, your...

By: naughtyannie | Category: Supernatural | Score: 4.9| Added: 22 Jan 2014

Hotdogs and Tacos

- Fourteen days and lonely nights Since I sailed away,  When I finally sailed into your dock You knew I would wanna stay. However I'm not too sure  If you would feel the same way,  But I know you’ll...

By: trinket | Category: Erotic Poems | Score: 5| Added: 01 Mar 2014